It can be tough feeling like your new place isn’t home. You might not feel comfortable in it or that you are in it alone. Either way, there are some things that you can do to get more comfortable living alone for the first time.
Begin with getting more comfortable being alone. Take the time to go do things alone that you would normally do with other people. Once, you are comfortable being alone then you should begin to make your new place feel like a home that you can enjoy.
Let’s discuss in greater detail what I mean by this.
Learn To Be Comfortable Doing Things Alone
We are social creatures and because of that we sometimes feel awkward doing things alone. Yet, as a new adult, you have to learn how to be comfortable doing things alone. And the only way to get comfortable with it is by intentionally going out and doing things alone.
Below is a list of just a few activities you can start doing alone to slowly make yourself more comfortable with living and exploring a new place alone.
Go to a movie alone
This is became of my favorite things to do after I started living alone for the first time.
Go see a movie by yourself. Do the whole process as you would if someone were with you. Get popcorn and soda and maybe some other snacks if you want. Sit down and enjoy the movie.
This would be a great first step at getting comfortable doing an activity alone since you are spending most of your time watching something. You are less likely to feel the aloneness since the movie is there to entertain you.
Go sit at a coffee shop alone
Go to a local coffee shop and order what you like. Take a seat and just enjoy whatever you ordered. Sit there and look around at your surroundings. Stay at the coffee shop for at least thirty minutes.
It is important to not bring your laptop or use your phone during this time. These serve as crutches to make you feel less alone. Try to not turn to them for this exercise. You can do it.
Go to a dinner alone
Make a reservation at a nice restaurant that you have to dress up and go to. Enjoy your dinner alone and just experience the process as a solo person. It will definitely feel awkward at first, especially between the time of ordering and waiting on the food to arrive at the table. Nevertheless, this is all in the hopes of making you feel more comfortable living alone.
When the food comes the rest is simple. You just eat and pay the check. The hardest part about this activity is waiting alone. Again, be sure not to turn to your phone as a crutch. Try and stay focused on observing your surroundings. You might be quite entertained by what you notice.
Go on a picnic alone
Build a picnic basket lunch for yourself and find a nice park where you can enjoy it. You want to pull out all the stops here. I am talking about having a nice picnic blanket, some wine, and good food.
Now, unlike some of the other activities above, you are encouraged to bring a book or your laptop to watch something on. However, a picnic at the park is the perfect opportunity to get in some primetime people-watching.
For me, this was the hardest activity to get comfortable doing alone. I felt so awkward going to the park and setting up a solo picnic, but once I sat down and started eating I felt so proud of myself. Plus the people-watching was pretty enjoyable.
Add some structure or organization to your life
Living alone for the first time can be overwhelming at times especially in the beginning. Worse though is that it can sometimes feel like you are not doing anything with your life.
Bring in some structure to your life. If there are certain activities that you like to do, be sure to create a schedule to accomplish them. One method of scheduling is block scheduling. Block scheduling helps keep you on task and gives you a framework in which to focus for a given time period.
You create an overview of your day. Then you work on that type of task during its blocked time.
An example schedule is below:
| Activity | Time |
| Workout | 7 to 9 AM |
| Life V Lifestyle | 10 AM to 1 PM |
| Work | 1 PM to 6 PM |
| Relax | 6 PM to Bedtime |
Adding structure to your life when living alone, helps you feel less like time is passing you by. As you can see above, a block schedule isn’t overly specific. It is an overview of the type of task activity that you intend to work on. The schedule gives you the flexibility to work on a number of tasks related to the overall topic.
It was an especially helpful way to plan study time in school.
Additionally, taking some time to organize your life will help you feel more in control.
What do I mean by organizing your life? I am talking about setting priorities, organizing your finances, and coming up with goals for yourself.
When you feel in control you are less likely to worry about being alone. If interested, check out this article I wrote titled “How to Organize Your Life As A New Adult.”
Limit Social Media Time
Don’t spend all of your time on social media. It will only make you feel more alone and probably less comfortable. Remember that most of the things people post on social media are there to draw out some type of emotion.
So limit your time and remember to experience the world in real life.
Nurture Personal Relationships In Real Life
Just because you are living alone does not mean that you have to be alone 24/7. It is important to reach out to your friends and spend in-person time together.
Seeing and hanging out with people will help you feel less alone when you return home. Plus, it is always important to nurture those personal relationships that are important to you.
Recognize The Perks Of Living Alone
There is a benefit to living alone. You do not have to share a space with anyone. You can do whatever you want whenever you want. It is quite freeing.
There’s no sharing a bathroom or kitchen. You can make noise whenever you want. You can even just live your whole day naked in your place.
It is up to you. You can do whatever!
Acknowledge that and recognize the power and freedom that it holds.
Increase Your DIY Skills
Learn how to do things yourself. This applies to fixing things where you live but also just in general. The more you know how to do the less reliable you feel on an external source. You increase your skills. You gain greater control over what you can create and do.
Find DIY opportunities and embrace the challenge of learning how to do them. Crazy enough YouTube is actually a pretty helpful place to find DIY videos.
Make Your Living Space Feel Like A Home
You want to make the place where you live a relaxing environment when you enter it. It should feel like home to you. You can bring a piece of your old home to your new one or you start from scratch. It does not matter. You only need to add things to the space that help you relax and feel more comfortable.
What are your thoughts? What are you doing to get used to living alone for the first time? Let us know in the comments below!
Best of luck adulting!
And Remember,
Adulting Starts Here
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